Stellantis is finally breathing again, though it feels more like a desperate gasp for air than a victory lap. After teetering on the edge of a total collapse, the Q1 2026 financial results suggest the disaster has been successfully moved to the rearview mirror. Net revenues are up six percent, the bottom line is finally flashing a positive sign, and North America has been doing all the heavy lifting.
While the general market was busy tanking by 6%, Stellantis managed to flip the script, posting a 4% gain in the U.S., a 15% jump in Canada, and a staggering 19% surge in Mexico. The group is now loudly proclaiming itself the fastest-growing automaker in the region.
While the suits in the boardroom are busy polishing a new corporate master plan due by the end of the month, David Scott Neal II of Mozee Inc. decided to ignore the spreadsheets and build a better reality. Operating under the CGI alias nemojunglist, he’s imagined a parallel universe where Stellantis actually cares about your pulse rate. He’s designed a quartet of models based on a hypothetical performance platform that makes the current lineup look like a fleet of white-label appliances.
We’re talking about a crimson Alfa Romeo Giulietta and a Maserati Quattro Stile, both packing a V12 engine that evokes nostalgia without feeling like a cheap cover band. There’s even a gold-leafed Citroën Justine, a V6 biturbo hybrid designed for people who want comfort without the boredom.
And then, there’s the crown jewel, a new Dodge SRT Viper. Neal envisions a V10 built on the distribution of the Hurricane straight-six engine, complete with a manual gearbox for the three of us left who still want to shift our own gears. He calls the design “poisonous,” and it’s hard to disagree. It’s the kind of car that makes you want to forgive the last decade of automotive mediocrity.
Stellantis’ actual roadmap doesn’t have room for V12s or venomous snakes. The group’s concrete “new course” is laser-focused on four priority brands: Jeep, Ram, Peugeot, and Fiat. Dodge is notably absent from the high-stakes conversation. That means the Viper, the V10, and Neal’s digital masterpieces will stay exactly where they were born: on a high-resolution screen.
