Stellantis is at it again, doubling down on the kind of corporate “vision” that usually ends in a pile of unsold inventory and a lot of confused shareholders. The latest stroke of genius? Transforming the Fiat Grande Panda into a pickup truck for the European market by 2028. Yes, you read that correctly.
While Americans treat their trucks like mobile living rooms and South Americans actually use them for work, Stellantis CEO Antonio Filosa is set to announce on May 21st that Europeans are suddenly going to fall in love with a pint-sized “trucklet”.
Olivier Francois is already spinning the narrative, claiming this model will inherit the legacy of the Fiat Strada. There’s just one tiny detail: the Strada actually sells in markets where people need them. In Europe, pickups are a niche within a niche. Yet, the plan is to shove this “Giga Panda” family expansion down our throats using the “Smart Car” platform. And the production will likely happen in Morocco, Serbia, or Turkey. Italy? Forget about it.
Technically, we’re looking at a vehicle under 4.4 meters with a front end that looks like a 1980s video game. It’s “robust”, they say, pointing at the plastic cladding and AI-generated renders. But under the hood lies the real punchline: Stellantis wants to sell this as a hybrid or a full electric pickup.
Think about that for a second. We are currently living in a reality where the average European consumer is already terrified of buying a standard electric SUV due to price and charging anxiety. Now, Stellantis expects them to buy an electric pickup and use it for… what, exactly?
The numbers tell a story that the suits in Paris and Turin seem to be ignoring. The Italian pickup market is worth $1.4 billion, but it’s dominated by professionals who want one thing: the Ford Ranger. The Ranger owns fifty percent of the market because it’s a tool, not a lifestyle accessory. Furthermore, 72% of buyers are still clutching their diesel keys for dear life because, in the real world, torque and range actually matter.
Stellantis is essentially bringing a knife, an electric, pixelated, Serbian-made knife, to a gunfight. By 2028, we’ll see if Europe has suddenly developed a thirst for “eco-friendly” cargo beds, or if this will just be another expensive monument to corporate wishful thinking.
