So much for the “utopian” future where computers drive us to work while we sip lattes and pretend to be productive. The latest data is out, and it’s a cold, hard slap in the face for the tech evangelists. It turns out that robotaxis aren’t just failing to save us. They are actively wrecking cars at four times the rate of us “flawed” biological drivers. 400% more mayhem, brought to you by millions of lines of code that apparently can’t distinguish a stop sign from a hallucination.
While the industry bigwigs at Waymo and Cruise keep spinning fairy tales about “safety-first” algorithms, the reality on the asphalt is a demolition derby. We’ve been told for years that humans are the problem. Too distracted, too tired, too prone to road rage.
Well, our “errors” are amateur hour compared to the systematic chaos these rolling computers are unleashing. It’s not just a minor fender-bender here and there. We’re talking about a spectacular inability to navigate the world we actually live in.
And if the crash stats weren’t embarrassing enough, let’s talk about the Tesla that decided it was actually a submarine. In a move that defines “unintended consequences,” one of Elon’s finest decided to take a literal plunge, proving that Full Self-Driving might actually mean “Full Self-Drowning”. It’s the ultimate irony. A high-tech marvel, worth a small fortune, trying to join the fish.
The narrative that autonomous vehicles are our path to a zero-accident world is officially underwater. We are being sold a revolution that can’t even handle a simple turn without a 4x multiplier on disaster. It’s a classic case of Silicon Valley arrogance meeting the brutal reality of the physical world.
While we’re taxed and lectured into giving up our steering wheels for the “greater good”, the machines are busy proving they have the survival instincts of a toaster in a bathtub. In the end, it’s the same old story. Big promises, expensive hardware, and a trail of wreckage that suggests we might want to keep our hands on the wheel a little while longer.
